He chuckled. “That’s because you didn’t see them when they were fourteen. Rebekkah had no control over them. My father was a dick to do what he did. He had to know that alpha children need more care than the lesser ranks.”

My brows rose at that. “They do?”

“Yeah. Especially from the same gendered parent. For them to have to do without their father, an alpha, was really hard, and I tried to pick up the strain, but there was only so much I could do.”

“Why?”

“Because father loathed them.” He sucked in a breath. “Now that I have you, I kind of understand, but after last night’s conversation, I was thinking about it, and I realized that if you needed a fourth mate to ground you, if you were truly so powerful that it kept you sane and healthy? I’d deal with it, even if I truly hope it never happens. I’d have to. For you.

“Which,” he grunted, “tells me that my father was a prick, and while I always knew that, it sucks because I did love him. He was a good father to me, but he was a shit alpha for the pack.”

“You can right his wrongs,” I rasped, feeling his irritation and wanting to soothe him.

“I can only try.” He sighed. “Anyway, when they were fourteen, they’d get into the worst shit in school. I had to take them under my wing—had no choice, or they’d have been expelled. Pulling stupid pranks—”

“Ethan?” I jerked back to gape at him. “Ethan was pulling pranks?”

“He wasn’t always the Tin Man he looks like now,” he said dryly. “Back then, he was a real piece of work.”

“What changed?”

He shrugged. “A girl. He got all serious with someone, and then she found her mate. It made him turn to books.”

My nose crinkled at that. “I’m jealous. How stupid is that?”

He shrugged. “Not stupid.” He pulled a similar move as I had earlier—ran his finger along my bottom lip—then he tapped it. “I wish you’d never lost your child, sweetheart, but my jealousy wishes that it’d been mine.”

My eyes prickled with tears. A few days ago, I’d probably have taken that the wrong way. But now? I got it.

I did.

They hadn’t come to me pure, and I wouldn’t be going to them the same way either, and we both accepted that, but it didn’t stop the wolves inside us from demanding more. Demanding everything.

Gnawing on my bottom lip, I rasped, “There’s an irony to the fact that I wouldn’t be here, that we might never have found each other, if it weren’t for the steps I took back when I was a kid.”

“No, I’m not surprised. It’s not irony, it’s fate.” He reached up and cupped my chin. “We were always meant to be on this path, but I just wish you hadn’t been hurt along the way. I wish—”

I gently shook my head, caught his eyes, and whispered, “You don’t have to say another word. I understand. Maybe I wouldn’t have before, but now I do.” I released a whistle. “I know you wanted me to revert to human skin earlier than I did, but to be honest, I’m glad I didn’t. I think I’m more comfortable with the she-wolf than I might ordinarily be, and even though I’m still learning her and she’s still learning me, I think it’s made us gel together better.”

“Then I’m glad,” he said simply.

“Would you tell me some of the stuff Ethan and Austin got up to?”

His lips twitched. “You really want to know? You should ask them. In fact, ask Austin. He’s a great storyteller.”

“He is?” I queried, my eyes wide at the thought, then I tipped my head to the side and said, “No, that’s dumb. I can see that.”

“If he could sit still without getting bored, he’d make a fantastic recanter—”

“Recanter?”

He winced. “Sorry, I forget you don’t know all the terms. It’s interesting, really, but there are two positions in the pack both of them would fill perfectly. Ethan would make an exceptional keeper—they look after the pack’s library, recording everything and making sure our history is never lost. Then there are the recanters—the storytellers. The ones who pass down the fables, who teach the children the legends.”

I perked up at that. “I could see Austin doing that. That’s how the Roma pass on their history—through stories and through songs.”

“I’ve had my eye on him for that role for years, but he never seems to grow up.” He grunted. “Maybe when we’re a bit older, he’ll be ready.”

“You should have faith in him,” I chided. “I think he’d like the responsibility.”

He shook his head. “I know my brother,” he replied dryly. “Anyway, I need him as enforcer for a while. Until we can get things settled, then…”

When his voice waned, I tipped my head to the side as I studied his beautiful face. Kali Sara, how was a man this handsome mine? It was beyond belief. Not only that he would treat me as if I were a porcelain doll, as if I were precious, but that he’d treat me as his equal?

It blew my mind.

Because I didn’t want him to notice my goo-goo eyes, I prompted, “Then what?”

He shrugged. “This rite of my mother’s. It never made sense to me.”

“You mean, how she ended her life in return for you to gain a mate?” I blinked, because it sounded nuts to me, but what about this world wasn’t a little crazy?

“Yeah, that’s what I mean,” he rumbled, his gaze distant. “When she came to me with it, I never expected it to work. Never wanted it to work. Then it did. And barely a few hours later, I had you in my life. There’s no denying A led to B, but I’m curious where the hell she came up with A in the first place.

“I don’t have the time, patience, or wherewithal to focus on that at the moment. The pack’s changing for the first time in years, so I need to manage things from the top, but…” He hitched a shoulder. “It’s going to wear on me for a while.”

I could see that, and though I wanted to soothe him, I had no answers, no way of easing his confusion. “You don’t want him as your enforcer forever?”

He pulled a face. “Truth is with Ethan as beta, and Austin as enforcer, the lines between the roles will blur. Austin won’t realize that yet because he has self-esteem issues, but it’s true. Ethan looks to books, but he’s a strongbox—has no desire to impart his knowledge. That’s why he’d be a perfect keeper. Austin? He’s a gifted storyteller. The recanter is both. He’ll feed off Ethan’s knowledge banks, just like Ethan will look to Austin to shore up his position.”

“So the roles will blur again?” I nodded, understanding where he was coming from.

“Exactly.” His smile was wry. “But I can’t afford for that to happen yet. So even though I do want answers, they’ll just have to wait. Their current positions are going to be a nightmare. Betas are usually stronger than Brandon was, so Ethan is going to have a shit ton of work to do, which Austin, naturally, will help with.” He sighed. “Father let Brandon be beta for political reasons. He always was a fool.”

“What were they?”