"Oh God, yes, please. I need to feel that warm, wet skin...I need to be inside you..."

Holy...hell. I ran my hand down my stomach, but I couldn't quite make myself go any further. I was far too embarrassed, even alone. Kellan didn't know that though. "Does it feel good?" he groaned.

"Yes," I whispered. All of me felt tingly and nice, so that wasn't really a lie.

His breath increased. "Oh God, I need it harder...faster..."

"Yes, I whispered again. "Do it, do it faster..." I had to ceaselessly move my legs I was aching so bad, but I still hesitated to go through with my end of this.

Kellan, however, was not hesitating at all. "Oh, God, yes...don't stop...that feels so good, please don't stop..." I moaned again, re-biting my knuckle so hard I thought I might break the skin. He groaned deep, his breath in a pant. "I want to come...Kiera...come with me..."

I ran my hand back through my hair. Oh my God...he really was...

"Okay," I whispered, my voice husky. "Harder, Kellan, I need more of you in me," I murmured, my hand drifting back down to my stomach.

That got him going. "Yes...God, Kiera, you're so sexy, you feel so good. I'm in you...right now...can you feel me? Can you feel how deep I am?"

I groaned, louder than before and my hand strayed to the edge of my underwear. "God, Kellan, you're perfect...so perfect." My voice gained in strength as some of my inhibitions started leaving me. I wanted him. I wanted to do this. I wanted to finish this...together. "Yes, yes, take me..."

"Oh my God, Kiera, I'm almost there...come with me..."

"Yes, Kellan, do it...come for me..." Not believing I said that, I finally tucked a finger on the inside of my underwear.

That was when I heard something that dashed some cold water on my hot little moment. Kellan stopped breathing heavy and the phone muffled. Quieter than he'd been, but still loud enough to hear, I heard him say, "I'll have a Denver omelet...thank you."

I sat up in my bed, covering myself with my hands like we'd just gotten walked in on. Before he spoke to me again, I snapped out, "Kellan Kyle! Are you in a restaurant?"

"Well, I wouldn't exactly call this a restaurant...greasy spoon maybe." His breath was still a little fast, but way more calm than it had been.

I closed my eyes, running my hand down my face. "Please tell me you are not about to be arrested for indecent exposure."

He laughed a little. "No, I'm not."

I dropped my hand to my knee, floored. "You faked all that? Why would you do that to me?" I brought my knees to my chest, feeling sort of weird. He'd told me before when he'd faked a sexual act that it hadn't been his first time, but, damn...

Kellan sighed. "I never expected you to go along with it and when you did, well, I wasn't about to stop you from having your moment." In a whisper he added, "Even if I can't come right now...I want you to."

I bit my lip, feeling a little bad. I'd been faking it, too. "I may have been exaggerating my part in it...but I was thinking about it."

Kellan laughed. "Well, we'll call that a practice round then. Next time...I'll be somewhere private and you will actually touch yourself. Deal?"

I flushed, feeling that embarrassment creep back up. "Yeah," I mumbled.

I heard a voice in the background that sounded vaguely familiar. Sitting ramrod straight, I whispered, "Oh my God, please tell me that you're sitting alone."

Kellan paused. I could almost hear him debating on whether or not to answer me. "Um, well, no...the guys are here...and Justin. He says hey, by the way."

"Oh my God!" I exclaimed, disconnecting the phone in my mortification. Not only had he faked that little moment, but he'd faked it in front of his friends and the celebrity that I knew I'd never be able to look in the eye again. God...men...

Chapter 13

Home for the Holidays

A week later, I was at my parents' place, staring at their Christmas tree, ticking down the minutes in my head. Ever since arriving in the town of my birth early in the week, I'd been hoping that Kellan could join me. Sure, I'd have to do some fanciful fast talk to get my dad to concede on letting him sleep in the house, but even if he had to stay at a nearby motel, at least he'd be with me, and not...who knows where.

But the guys were being kept busy right up until nearly the end. Just last night, the eve before Christmas Eve, he'd played a show in New York. It had been their largest show to date, and Kellan had been all excited energy when he'd finally called me...at four in the morning. Now that our time zones were closer together, he was calling me after I was asleep. I didn't mind though, groggily murmuring some sort of response to his stories.

My sister came out and joined me on our mom's plastic-coated couch. It squeaked a bit when she sat down. Looping her arm over my shoulders, she handed me a cup of spiced coffee. I took it, smiling as I watched the blinking Christmas lights reflecting in the white ceramic. The scent of cinnamon wafted up, reminding me of multiple things-baking with my mom, the candles my grandma burned non-stop, and of course, Kellan. Anything with coffee always reminded me of Kellan.

Clinking our cups, Anna smiled brightly. "Merry Christmas, Kiera."

I tilted my head at her as I took a sip. "Merry Christmas, Anna."

Looking outside, to the light snow that was starting to fall, Anna shivered. "You excited to finally see Kellan again? It's been what...almost two months?"

I sighed and leaned back into the couch. "Yeah." It had actually gone by quicker than I thought it would. Kellan's little scavenger hunt had eased the time passing, along with his phone calls and periodic texts. If anything, Kellan was good at keeping in touch. It helped. It let me know that he missed me, too.

Anna sighed and leaned back with me. "Yeah, I miss those guys." She frowned after she said it and I leaned into her side. Other than a few phone calls and quite a few snapshots of Griffin's junk, Anna hadn't gotten much out of her pseudo-boyfriend. He wasn't even coming out to see her for Christmas, which I was sort of glad about. He and Matt were visiting their family in California, while Evan was going home to see Jenny. Rachel was flying out to seeing Matt in L.A., but Anna hadn't shown any interest in flying out to meet up with Griffin. Plus, I was pretty sure Griffin hadn't asked her to.

"I'm sure Griffin misses you, Anna. He wouldn't still text you if he didn't." I hoped that sounded encouraging, but really, their relationship still mystified me.

Anna rolled her eyes and scoffed, bringing her feet up onto the couch that our mom was anal about keeping clean. "Whatever...I'll see him when I see him." Her voice was a little strained and I thought she almost looked misty-eyed...but I couldn't really tell.

Shaking her head, she looked over at me. "When's Kellan coming up?"

I looked out the living room archway to the kitchen, to see if either of our parents was listening. Mom was carving up a turkey, the sound of her electric cutting knife filling the air. Occasionally I could hear her snapping at Dad to stay out of the olives. Smiling, I figured they were engrossed in their own activities and couldn't hear me. I didn't want to bring up Kellan's arrival any more than I had to.

"Don't know." I lifted the phone I had in my other hand. "He's going to call when he knows for sure." As if on cue, the cell buzzed in my palm. I blinked at the contraption as Anna started laughing.

Shaking my head at Kellan and his timing, I read the text message on my screen. 'I can't wait to see you tonight. I'll be in around nine. Should I meet you at your parents' place?'

Giggling that this was actually going to happen, I texted back a reply that was horribly impractical. 'No, have the cab take you here...'

I texted him the address of my most favorite park in all the world. I knew it was romantic and sappy, meeting up at a secluded spot instead of just having him come straight here, but he'd been gone for an eternity, and I wanted to shower him in affection before introducing him to my parents. Plus, he had said that he wanted to see all of the places I loved.

'Okay, it's a date. I love you.'

I texted that I loved him too, then held the phone to my chest as I sighed contently. God, I'd missed him. Anna just stared at me, an eyebrow raised. "Huh," she muttered.

Adjusting my posture so I didn't look so school girlish, I shook my head. "Huh, what?"

She smiled, then kissed my head. "Nothing...you've just got it bad, Kiera." She frowned, just slightly. "I hope...I hope you get what you want."

I started to ask her what she meant but she stood up and left the room. Maybe she was just starting to have twisting feelings about Griffin and she was transferring that doubt onto my relationship with Kellan. If she knew something...I was sure she'd tell me right away. Sister's code and all.

The rest of that day went by so slowly that I felt like another couple of months had gone by. Kellan and I being together again, even if it was just for one night, and he had to leave again tomorrow, was the best Christmas gift I could have asked for. Better than any material object in the world.

Everyone dressed in their finest for our Christmas Eve meal. It was just the four of us, but we'd always fancied the meal up like we were serving the Queen; Mom even brought out the good china. Dad dressed in his favorite sweater vest, looking very academic and proper, like he should be in a leather-bound chair, smoking a pipe while discussing Thoreau. Mom put on her pearls, her dress neatly steamed and pressed. I scrounged through my old closet and found a simple black dress. Anna outdid us all in a sleek, fitted red dress that she nearly spilled out of.

Glancing at the clock on the wall as the food was set so appealingly that even Martha Stewart would be proud, Mom said, "Should we wait for Kellan, dear?"

My dad twisted his lips, not thrilled that a lazy, drug-smoking rocker was about to throw off his Christmas traditions. I didn't bother telling him, again, that Kellan wasn't like that. Instead, I sighed at the seven o'clock time staring me in the face. "No, he's still a couple of hours away. I'll save him some for when he gets here."

Mom nodded and began serving slices of poultry. Dad raised an eyebrow at me. "You know, we never fully went over where he'll be staying, Kiera...it won't be with you."

Sighing, I looked down. "I know, Dad...no boys in the house." Geez, you'd think I was still fifteen.

Anna crossed her arms over her chest. "Don't be ridiculous, Dad. Where exactly is he supposed to stay?" She pointed her finger out the window, to the main part of the city of Athens in the distance. "There were no rooms at the inn on Christmas Eve, remember?"

"Anna," Mom warned, her visage disapproving of my sister's analogy.

Anna sighed and shrugged. "Just saying, things are going to be full. You can't just kick him out if he's got nowhere to be...that's not very merry." I smiled, loving that Anna was sticking up for him. Remaining quiet, since Anna could sometimes sway our parents more easily than I could, I watched my dad frown, then consider.

Rubbing his lip, he thought for a moment. Finally, he raised his eyes to me. "He can stay in the tent out back. I'll set it up after dinner."

"A tent? Dad!" I finally exclaimed. "It's snowing outside...he'll freeze to death." Crossing my arms now, I added, "You were going to let Denny stay with me last year...in my room."