Bound by the Past Page 12

“Why are you crying?” I asked carefully, trying to figure out Valentina’s mood. She didn’t strike me as someone who cried often.

“Because you scare me!”

“Until today you never seemed scared of me,” I said. Evoking fear in others came naturally to me and it was something I’d used to my advantage in the past and still did. Fear certainly would have made Valentina reveal the truth but I didn’t want my wife scared of me.

“Then maybe I’m a good actress.”

“You have no reason to be scared of me, Valentina. What are you hiding?”

Her eyes flitted down to my chin, avoiding my gaze, trying to cling to the lie she had no way of protecting. “Nothing.”

I wrapped my fingers around her wrist, a warning and a request. “You are lying about something. And as your husband, I want to know what it is.”

Valentina’s eyes flashed with anger, surprising me in their vehemence. “You mean as the Boss you want to know, because so far you haven’t exactly been acting like my husband.”

She was right. I hadn’t acted like a husband, not a good one, not even a decent one. I had been trampling on those vows but that wasn’t the point, and I wouldn’t allow her to make it one. “Why would you still be a virgin?”

“I told you I’m not!” She tried to evade the situation by ripping from my hold but I didn’t release her. Instead, I drew her closer until she was pressed up to me, but I regretted my decision the moment her scent hit me, a spicy perfume with a flowery note and Valentina’s very own tantalizing scent. Her pulse sped up, her lips parted, eyes dilated as she stared up at me. She licked her lips, a nervous gesture, and my groin tightened with a new wave of desire for the woman in front of me. I wanted Valentina, there was no denying it.

I shoved the sensation down. “So if I were to take you toward our bed right now—” I said quietly and pressed Valentina closer to our bed. “—and make you mine, I wouldn’t find out that you lied to me just now.”

She wouldn’t be able to hide it from me if she was a virgin. When I’d taken Carla’s virginity, there had been no mistaking it. Pain flared in my chest, burning hot, and I shoved any thought of her out of my mind.

Valentina tugged at my hold. “You wouldn’t because you won’t take me to that bed now.”

I focused on the woman in front of me. She’d tried to sound certain but a hint of uncertainty remained. “I won’t?”

“No, because you wouldn’t take me against my will. You disapprove of rape.”

“That’s what you hear?” I asked with a laugh.

She held my gaze. “Yes. You gave the Underbosses direct orders to tell their men you’d castrate anyone who used rape as a means of revenge or torture.”

“I did. I think a woman should never have to submit to anyone but her husband. But you are my wife.” In our world, a woman’s body belonged to her husband. Nobody would question me no matter what I did to Valentina, not only because my word was law but also because our old-fashioned traditions protected me.

Valentina shivered, the sophisticated mask slipping, revealing what I often forgot: she was much younger than me. “But still,” she whispered.

“Yes, still,” I said firmly and released her. “Now I want you to tell me the truth. I’ll always treat you with respect, but I expect the same from you. I don’t tolerate lies. And eventually, we will share a bed and then, Valentina, I’ll know the truth.”

“When will we ever share a bed like husband and wife, and not just sleep beside each other? Will that ever happen?”

If only she knew how often I’d imagined fucking her, and how desperately I wanted to throw her on the bed. “The truth. And remember I will know eventually.”

Valentina ducked her head, her shoulders tensing.

“Valentina.”

“What I said in the living room was the truth,” she admitted quietly, looking up at me through her lashes. Her cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

A strange thrill shot through me at her admittance, unexpected and unwanted. “That’s what I thought, but now I ask why?”

“Why is it such a surprising thought that Antonio didn’t want me? Maybe he didn’t find me attractive. You obviously don’t, or you wouldn’t spend most evenings in your office and your nights with your back to me. We both know that if you wanted me, if you found me desirable at all, I’d have lost my virginity on our wedding night.”

Desirable wasn’t a strong enough word to describe Valentina. She was gorgeous, elegant. My eyes dipped to her neckline. During her few seduction attempts in the first days, she’d worn lingerie that had almost broken my resolve. Now I was glad my self-control had won out. If I’d fucked Valentina in those days, it would have been fueled with anger, hard and fast. I would have noticed her innocence too late and might have hurt her. That wasn’t what she deserved. And yet I knew she would never get the lovemaking she wanted for her first time. “I thought we agreed on the fact that I wouldn’t force you,” I said.

Valentina’s chest heaved and she blushed further. “But you wouldn’t have to force me. You are my husband and I want to be with you. I’ve practically thrown myself at you for days now, and you didn’t even notice my body. If you found me attractive, you would have shown some kind of reaction. I guess I’m just lucky to always end up with husbands who find me repulsive.”

Anger filled me. Anger at myself for being incapable of doing what I should have done on our wedding night. “You aren’t repulsive to me. Trust me, I find you attractive.”

Valentina’s eyebrows twitched in doubt. How could she believe I didn’t desire her? Most of my damn thoughts these days revolved around fantasies of how I wanted to claim her pussy and mouth. I stepped closer to her, trying to ignore the way my body screamed to make her mine. “I do. Do not doubt my words. Whenever I catch a glimpse of the creamy white skin of your thighs…” I stroked her soft thigh, feeling goosebumps rise on her skin. She was warm and soft and mine. Shock flashed across Valentina’s face, followed by desire, beckoning to a side of me I was doing my damnedest to suppress. “Or when I see the outline of your breasts through the little nothings you wear to bed…” I continued, unable to stop myself from touching the swell of Valentina’s breasts. “I want to throw you onto our bed and bury myself in you.” The truth lingered between us and I quickly retracted my hand, forcing back my desire.

“You do? Then why—”

I pressed a finger against Valentina’s mouth, silencing her. The feel of her hot breath against my skin raised images of my cock in her mouth. It was a losing battle, I knew it, had known it for a long time. “It’s my turn to ask questions, and you promise not to lie.” She gave a small nod, worry swirling in her eyes. “Why did Antonio not sleep with you?”

Valentina was a woman very few men could resist. I’d seen the way many of my soldiers looked at her when they thought I wasn’t paying attention.

“I promised him not to tell anyone ever.”

“Antonio is dead,” I said. It didn’t sit well with me that she chose loyalty to her dead husband over loyalty to me, but I knew I was being hypocritical. “I’m your husband now, and your promise to me is more important.”