“Can we get the baby now?”

Sal shook his head. “Theoretically. But we should give it another two to three weeks at least.”

How could I make sure the baby was safe? I’d have to keep an eye on Gaia 24/7 and hope she got over Andrea’s death. I knew I was foolish for hoping she could. And really, what could I hope for at this point? That we’d live under a roof, hating each other? Gaia would spend every waking moment wishing for my cruel death, and I’d spend every breath I took resenting her for what she’d done. This marriage was dead. It had been from the very start.

“Stay with her,” I said. I walked out and into the master bedroom where I showered quickly and dressed before I headed to Daniele’s room.

He’d fallen asleep, curled up on his side in bed. Slowly, I walked over to him and sank down on the floor. I stroked his unruly hair. He looked like Gaia. It’s what everyone had been saying from the very start. Her brown eyes and dark-blond hair, even her facial features. He had nothing of me. My sisters and mother had similar dark-blond hair color, so I’d assumed he’d inherited it from them. I closed my eyes. Andrea and Gaia shared very similar looks. If Andrea was Daniele’s father, that explained why he had nothing of me.

Acute pain sliced through my chest. I looked at the little boy I loved more than anything in the world. I’d never loved Gaia, not for herself. I’d respected and cared for her because she’d given me the purest gift in the world: a child.

I stood abruptly. Voices sounded in the corridor, one of them belonging to Father. I stepped outside, finding Faro and my father talking in urgent whispers. The moment Father looked at me, I wished I could have kept this from him. He limped toward me, looking pale and weak. He gripped my shoulder, his eyes searching mine. “If you want to make Gaia disappear after the baby is born, nobody would blame you, least of all me, my son.”

I nodded. It wouldn’t be the first time a Made Man killed his wife for cheating. Would things have been different if Gaia hadn’t been pregnant? Would I have killed her like I had Andrea? I’d killed women before. The whores the bikers kept around to suck their dicks—but they’d been armed and trying to kill me and my men.

Gaia was still a woman, still my wife, still the mother of Simona and Daniele. I wouldn’t kill her unless it was her life against that of my children or mine.

“I don’t want her to disappear.”

Father looked puzzled. “Faro told me everything. How do you want to keep her around? She’s a danger to you.”

“I’m not worried about my life but those of my children.”

Father glanced at Faro then back at me. “You don’t know if they even are your children. You need to have a test as soon as possible.”

“And then?” I growled.

Father shrugged as if the matter was easy. “If they aren’t yours, we can send Gaia and them to live with her family, and you can find a new wife who can give you children.”

Giving away Daniele? Even our unborn baby girl had already lodged herself into my heart since I’d first heard her heartbeat and seen the ultrasound image.

Father clutched my shoulder more tightly. “Cassio, be reasonable. You need an heir. You can’t want to raise the children of another man. For God’s sake, those kids might be the result of incest. It’s sin.”

“Sin,” I repeated, chuckling bitterly. “I beat a man to death with my bare hands today. I skinned and burned a biker today to get information. I’ve killed more men than I can remember. We sell drugs, weapons. We blackmail and torture. How can a child be a sin?”

Father lowered his arm. “Let’s postpone this discussion to another day.”

“There won’t be another discussion, Father. Daniele and Simona are my children, end of story. Anyone who claims otherwise will have to pay the price.” Part of my resolve was cowardice. I was scared of the truth, scared of looking into Daniele’s face and not seeing my son, but Andrea’s. I’d never allow that to happen.

Father straightened. “Don’t forget who you are talking to.”

“I’m not. I respect you. Don’t destroy this by saying something I won’t forgive.”

Father leaned more heavily on his cane, letting out a deep sigh. “If you prefer to live in the dark.”

“The dark is where we’re all most comfortable.” I nodded at Faro. “Get rid of the body.” He inclined his head then turned to do his job. I could always count on him. But trusting him after today? I’d never trust anyone ever again.

My gaze settled on Gaia, whom I could see lying on the bed from my vantage point.

“How will you ever be able to look into her face again after what she’s done?” Father asked.

“I doubt it’ll be an issue. She probably won’t ever look into my face after what I’ve done to Andrea.”

Three weeks later, Simona was born by Cesarean section. Gaia’s emotional state had worsened, so we had to restrain her at night and have her watched every minute of the day, even when she went to the toilet. Elia, Sybil, and Mia took turns keeping an eye on her. I couldn’t even be in the same room with her without her getting hysterical. I gladly avoided her, however. Even though I hadn’t loved her, her betrayal cut me in a way I hadn’t thought possible. My home had been my safe haven, a place where I could relax after grueling workdays, and my children were the light of my life. Now everything was draped in bitter darkness.

Daniele didn’t understand why he couldn’t visit his mother, but I was scared for him and scared of what she’d tell him. Gaia had always been vindictive, and now she had a reason to hate me.

When I held Simona the day after her birth, because Gaia didn’t want me there during labor, I fell in love with that little girl. Blood meant little in this moment, and I’d never allow it to.

Gaia didn’t get over Andrea’s death. I was foolish to think she could for the sake of Daniele and Simona. For a while, she made me believe she did. She took pills that calmed her, and eventually she almost seemed like her old self. Sybil and Mia still had to take over most of the care for Daniele and Simona. But things seemed to be looking up. We managed to play our roles in public, managed to avoid each other behind closed doors. Sometimes we settled for politeness, but the hatred in Gaia’s eyes always reminded me of the reality of our situation. I’d killed the man she loved. She would never forgive me, and I didn’t need her forgiveness. I only needed her to find it in her to take care of our children.

But Gaia focused most of her love and attention on the last gift from Andrea: Loulou. She treated the dog as if it was a human, lavished it with tenderness and loving words she should have given only Daniele and Simona.

I didn’t allow her to be alone with our children. Sybil or Mia had to be around because I still wasn’t sure if Gaia wouldn’t kill our children just to hurt me as much as Andrea’s death hurt her. I never considered her capable of infanticide, but now I wasn’t so sure. Images of my children’s lifeless bodies haunted my nightmares.

We lived a lie, which became more and more unbearable every day, but at the same time, I got used to it.

Four months after Simona’s birth, on the day of our eighth anniversary, Gaia ended it all. I’d made dinner reservations in our favorite restaurant for appearance’s sake, but the moment I came home I knew something was wrong.