Ravage Page 45
“Don’t give a fuck what you or anyone else thinks of me.”
The only people I do care about are Sasha and my daughter.
I move over to the cot bed and peer down at my kid, my heart cracking open for her. She’s perfect. I don’t deserve such innocence, such purity in my life. Not with my filthy history, but I can’t bring myself to walk away. I want this. I want the family. I need it more than ever now.
“Hey, baby girl.” I move my finger over her cheek like I’ve seen Sasha do a hundred times. Lily’s mouth pulls into a smile, and I find myself mirroring the gesture as she talks to me in broken English I can mostly understand.
“I’m going to leave you guys to it,” Lucy says, making her escape.
“Go easy on Lucy,” Sasha says once the door snicks shut behind her. “She’s used to being my protector.”
I snort. I don’t give a fuck what she’s used to being, but for Sasha’s sake I dial back the anger. I glance down at my daughter and that rage vanishes completely.
“I’m buying a house.”
Her brows pull together. “Okay.” She draws the word out, as if unsure where this is going.
“I want you and Lily with me.”
I watch as her eyes soften. “I want that too, but what about Lucy? I can’t just leave her. She took care of us all these—”
I silence her with a kiss. “I’ll make sure she’s taken care of. Let’s get our girl her treatment and get her home.”
34
Sasha
Tyler squeezes my hand for the third time in as many minutes. I know he’s nervous. We both are. We’re sitting in the hospital waiting area while Fury is in with the doctors and Whizz. So far, it’s been quiet, but I’m braced for whatever might happen. The man might be a fierce bastard, but he’s also shit-scared of needles, and they need to take a blood sample to confirm he’s a match for Lily-May. I’m eager to get this side of things handled. I know a few days won’t make a difference, but every second that ticks by feels like a second too long. I want my daughter well and fast.
“Should we be worried by the silence?” I ask, biting my bottom lip and wondering if Fury has gone on a killing spree.
Tyler cups my face and I manage to receive his touch without flinching in pain. It’s been a week since Sin attacked me. My bruises are still ugly and prominent, but the cuts to my face are starting to scab over. I don’t know if they’ll scar, but I’m hopeful they won’t. I don’t want to have that constant reminder of that day looking back at me in the mirror, staring Ty in the face every time he looks at me.
“He’ll do this,” he says, and I smile, putting my faith in the man at my side.
Ty has been amazing the past few days. I didn’t expect nightmares, but the first night Ty ordered me back to the clubhouse to rest, they came. I was back in that room with Sin and every dream ended with him raping me again, not being saved by Ty and the guys.
I know he’s having his own dreams. He doesn’t talk about it, but his sleep hasn’t come easy. Nox told me it would stay with Ty for a while, what he did to Sin, but I hope he can eventually make peace with his decision. He deserves that.
“I know he’ll do it. I just don’t want him to kill Lily’s doctor.”
Ty snorts, but doesn’t deny that could happen. It doesn’t help my anxiety. A yell sounds from the room, and I brace. Shit. The sound of something knocking over has my unease going through the roof. Ty squeezes my hand again.
After a few moments, the door opens to the exam room, and I sit up straighter as Whizz comes out looking a little ruffled, Fury on his heels.
“Done?” Ty asks.
Whizz huffs out a breath, giving Fury a sidelong glare. “Yeah.”
Fury holds a little cotton ball against the crook of his arm, his face pale. I come to my feet.
“There’s not enough thank yous in the world for what you’re doing for Lily-May.”
His brows draw down at my words. “You’re family.”
My heart soars at his words. Family. Being accepted back into the fold by the brothers is a relief. I thought I lost my family after I left. Sin made me believe they’d never welcome me back. He was wrong. These lads have opened their arms and hearts to me as if I never left at all, and they’ve opened to Lily-May too. I know she’ll always have the protection of the club, and it makes me feel safer knowing that.
Whizz juts his chin at Fury. “You ready to head back to the clubhouse?”
He nods.
We watch them head for the exit before we make our way back to Lily-May’s room. She’s been doing well this week, better than usual, but she still needs the transplant desperately. I wish they would hurry things up. I can’t bear seeing her in this place, suffering, but the doctors seem to be in control of things.
“Sash.” He stops me before we go back into the room. I peer up at him, feeling my stomach flip at the seriousness of his expression.
“What?”
He pulls an envelope from the inside pocket of his kutte and taps it against his fingers.
“It’s the paternity results. They came this morning.”
My mouth dries and my heart rate starts to accelerate until I can barely get air down my windpipe.
“I don’t need to see it.”
“I already opened it.”
I peer up at him. “You did?”
“I wanted to know first.”
I try to swallow through the dryness, but I can’t.
“And?”
He hands me the envelope. For a moment, I stare at it like it’s live ammunition. I don’t want to know the results, but if Tyler’s seen it, I’m assuming the news is good. He would never have shown me this if it confirmed Sin was Lily-May’s father.
Hope flares through me at that thought. I slowly pull the paper from the envelope and open it out. There’s a load of science shit at the start I don’t understand, so I skip to the main part of the letter, the part that says Lily-May is Tyler Jenkins’ kid.
My heart canters in my chest as I read those words. I must have already been pregnant when Sin raped me. The thought makes me sick to my stomach, but relief also floods me knowing he doesn’t have this final hold over me. That Lily won’t be dirtied by what happened to me. She can love her father. She would never have been able to love Sin.
Tears well in my eyes and I let them fall unchecked. Tyler swipes them away with his thumb.
“She’s mine.”
“She’s yours,” I sob out and then he pulls me into a bone-crushing hug. His hand brushes over my hair as I cling to him, feeling my legs wobble beneath me.
“You’re mine too.”
I smile through my tears. “Always.”
Epilogue
Ravage
Two months later…
The smell of meat cooking fills the air as soon as I step out of the car. My gaze moves across the compound towards the clubhouse, towards where the crowd of kuttes are gathered around the barbecue. From here, I can tell Titch and Levi are arguing over who is doing the cooking. I know because they have this same fucking debate during every monthly club cook out. Something about grilling meat outside brings the arsehole out in them both.