When he reaches the gate, he looks me over like I’m shit under his boots.

I lift my chin a little higher and take a moment to study the man who was once my world. Now, I’m not sure what he is. Old feelings still sit on the precipice. One hard push would shove them over.

My eyes rake over Rav’s face and I feel a hint of satisfaction as I take in his injuries. Judging from the cut over his brow and the layers of bruises down his jaw, he and Sin got into it pretty bad after I left. I hope Sin came worse off. He deserves everything he gets. I just wish Rav hadn’t got caught up in it.

But I’m not here to see justice get dished out. I’m here for Lily-May.

“Rav—”

He moves up to the fence and hisses at me, “You’re lucky I don’t put a bullet in you right now.”

“I know you think I’d deserve that, but I don’t. I didn’t do anything wrong.”

“You fucked my brother,” he counters, “and got pregnant.”

Pain lances through my chest at his words, pain that steals my breath. “That’s the past. I don’t care about that. All I care about is my daughter. You never showed.”

“Did I say I was going to?”

“Are you really going to do nothing? She could be yours, and even if she’s not, she’s your niece. I thought family was important to you.”

I throw that back in his face, because Rav has always been about family—whether that’s blood or club.

“You don’t know shit about me.”

“I used to know more than anyone.”

I see a thin break in the wall, but only because I can still read Rav. He keeps it locked tightly behind titanium walls.

“Get the fuck off my property before I do something we both regret.”

I give him a defiant glare. “Not until you promise to help my daughter.”

“I ain’t promising shit to you. You fucked me over, bitch.”

His words cut me, but I ignore the dirty feeling that washes over me. “Are you helping or not?”

“Not.”

“Then I guess I’ll be back tomorrow.”

I turn, walking away, but stop at the sound of the gate opening. Rav starts towards me and the look in his eyes should scare me but it doesn’t. I don’t fear Rav, although I probably should. I’ve known him since we were kids, and the man has been inside me more times than I can count.

“I mean it, Sash. Don’t come back here.”

“Then do the test.”

“Is she mine or Sin’s?”

I swallow back the years of pain that question brings up. “I don’t know.”

His jaw tightens and I see the ripple of disgust that goes through him. It’s nothing compared to the things I’ve said to myself over the years, the uncleanness I felt seeing Sin again after all this time. “If you won’t do this for me, Rav, do it for my father.”

Anger contorts his face.

“That’s low, bringing Priest into this.”

I shrug. “I’ll bring anyone into this if I think it’ll get my daughter the help she needs.”

He scowls at me, then hisses out, “What time tomorrow?”

“Ten.”

“I’ll be there. Then, we’re fucking talking about this.”

Relief floods me. It’s followed quickly by a hint of anger.

“Yeah, Rav, we’ll do that. Show up this time,” I tell him. Then I walk away from the compound and the man I once professed to love—a man I still love.

6

Ravage

“Do you need help relaxing tonight, Rav?” Melody’s voice would usually have me hard as a rock, but right now it’s grating on my nerves.

She flips her red hair over her shoulders and pushes her fake tits out at me, a move that would usually get my attention. I don’t even glance at them, which tells me all I need to know.

My mind is elsewhere.

Melody’s been with the club for a couple of years now, working her way through my boys like a knife through hot butter. She has a mouth like a hoover, which is the only reason I indulge her. Tonight, I’m not in the mood for club bunnies or anything else, though.

Tonight, my mind is full of a certain dark-haired Sasha.

I lean my forearms heavily on the bar and roll my tumbler of Scotch between my fingers.

Even thinking her name has my stomach twisting. Facing her tomorrow will be a coin flip as to whether I lose my shit or not.

I want answers to what the hell is going on, and I hope like fuck she gives them to me. I’m tired of being led around by her.

I want to know if Nox is right. He seems to think there’s more going on than I’m seeing, but I’m not convinced. It seems pretty cut and shut to me. She cheated and left.

Once, Sasha was the reason I existed. She was my world and kept all the darkness, all the demons that dog my steps at bay just long enough to make it through each day. Then she became the reason those demons were unleashed. Like Fury, once I was out of the box, there was no going back in it. I’m a different man now than the one she left behind. There’s no changing that. I’m scarred by the past.

Daimon slides onto the bar stool next to me as Melody sashays off to find another victim. I watch her go before returning my gaze to my Scotch.

He puts a hand up for a drink, which Kyle brings to him, sliding it in front of him like a good little prospect should.

“It’s done,” is all he says as he takes a sip of his pint.

He doesn’t need to explain. I know he’s talking about the money we laundered through our legal businesses. We had a big windfall from some of our drug running this week and it needed to disappear in ways we can spend it. As my money man, that falls to Daimon.

I don’t say anything, just sip my drink, letting the amber liquid burn my gullet as it goes down. I relish it. I need it. Feeling something is better than feeling nothing. Except my problem right now is I feel too much and I hate it. All my old wounds are torn open for the world to see—because of her.

I don’t know how to bring my walls down again, so I’m drinking myself into oblivion.

I don’t want to see her tomorrow, but I said I would be at the hospital and I’m a man of my word, so I’ll be there. I want answers. I want to know why she fucked my brother when I thought things between us were good.

I haven’t seen Sin since I beat several shades of hell out of him. I have no idea what condition he’s in. I don’t care either. The urge to strip him of his colours is chipping away at my every thought. I don’t know why I haven’t yet—the club bylaws would allow it—but something, some gut feeling, tells me I need to see this unfold, and if there’s one thing I trust, it’s my gut.

“Everything is on track for the run tomorrow?” I ask him. We have a drop off to do. Half a million pounds worth of cocaine to move to our supplier, Dizzy—a wannabe gangster who distributes our product. It’s risky, but it’s a run the boys do every other week, so they’re used to taking the necessary precautions to keep them off the law’s radar. Even if they get on that radar, I have a lot of the local plod on the payroll.

“Titch has the route planned. Me and Levi are going with him.”