Buried in Secrets Page 71

Her brow shot up. “You know about that?”

“Carnita told me. She said you’d traced Todd’s family back to the 1800s.”

She smiled. “Todd is more into it than I am. Maybe you should ask him when you talk to him.”

“Yeah. Maybe I will.” I lifted my hand. “I’ll let you get back to your free time while Bea sleeps. I’m off next Wednesday if that works for you for lunch. I’ll be free until my tutoring session at two-thirty.”

A smile lit up her eyes. “Perfect! Meet you there at noon?”

“Deal.”

I left and headed toward the highway. I didn’t need to be at work until five, and I wasn’t sure what to do next. I had plenty of housework at home to keep me occupied for the next few hours, but it wouldn’t feel right to just go home. Something had been weighing on me since our visit to Jonathon Whitmore’s house. I was worried about Ashlynn. I felt like I was part of the reason why she’d run off and lost her job, and I wanted to make sure she was okay.

I turned toward town and headed to the Crimshaw property. The beat-up pickup was there, but the car I’d seen before was gone. I parked in the driveway, then got out to walk over to the trailer.

“She ain’t home,” a voice called out from the house, and I saw Thad standing in the doorway.

“Ashlynn still hasn’t come back?” I asked.

“Nope. She won’t be comin’ back either. Dad kicked her out.”

Was that why she’d been at Jonathon’s place?

I walked toward him. “I heard that she and Chuck broke up.”

“Yep. He ran off with Becca Sloan after he found out the baby wasn’t his.” He slowly swung his head. “Man, was he pissed. Dad was pissed too. He called Ashlynn a slut and told her she had three weeks to get the hell out of the trailer. Mom was upset and tried to get him to let her stay, but he told her no and beat the shit out of her.”

I couldn’t hide my shock, and the small triumph in his eyes told me that he’d hoped to shock me. I decided to take advantage of that. “Did he beat her often?”

“Often enough,” he said, crossing his arms as he leaned against the door frame.

“Does he beat you too?”

His brow lifted like he thought I was stupid to ask something so obvious.

“What did he do to Ashlynn when he found out?”

“He tried to beat her too, but Mom stopped him. She was scared he’d hurt the baby.” Disgust washed over his face. “He should have done it and killed her baby. Then that poor bastard wouldn’t have to live in misery like the rest of us.”

I sucked in a breath. “Thad, I can get help for you.”

He released a bitter laugh. “Yeah, I tried that a couple of times and it bit me in the ass every time.”

“I know a teacher reported abuse…”

“I got an extra beatin’ for that,” he sneered. “Several, actually.”

“And the other time?”

Disgust filled his eyes. “Jim Palmer ain’t the saint everyone made him out to be.”

“I’ve gathered,” I bluffed, hoping to keep him talking.

“I bet you don’t know everything,” he said defiantly. “I bet you don’t know why my mom killed him.”

Oh God. Did he know? Had Jim Palmer impregnated Ashlynn like we suspected?

“No,” I said. “I don’t. Honestly, I’ve been trying to figure it out. I think she was pressured into it, and if the truth comes out, it might help her get a reduced sentence.”

He released a sharp bark of a laugh. “My dad will never let you tell anyone.”

“Why not?”

He started to say something, then stopped.

“Why won’t your dad help your mom?” I pressed.

“Because.” He glanced down at his feet and licked his bottom lip. Then he lifted his gaze to mine, his eyes shiny with tears. “Because my dad will never admit that his son is gay.”

I wasn’t sure what to say, but he looked at me expectantly, so I asked, “Are you gay, Thad?”

“Maybe?” He shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“There’s no shame in being gay,” I assured him. “I don’t know if Jim told you it was a sin—”

Thad burst out laughing.

I stared at him in confusion. “I know he was a youth leader. So if you talked to him about—”

He started laughing harder, but then it turned to sobs.

I climbed up the porch stairs and wrapped my arm around his back, then led him down to sit on the top step. He rested his forearms on his thighs and leaned forward, his body shaking with sobs.

“It’s my fault she’s in jail,” he wailed. “It’s all my fault.”

“No, Thad,” I said, rubbing his back lightly. “Your mother is a grown woman. She did this on her own. It’s not your fault.”

He continued to cry. “I should have died in that wreck. We were supposed to die.”

I gasped and leaned forward to study his face. Did he just tell me that he and Spencer had tried to kill themselves? “Thad, did you and Spencer…” I stopped and started again. Better to work our way up to it. “Is Spencer gay too?”

He hesitated, then nodded, breaking into a fresh round of wails.

“There’s nothing wrong with being gay, Thad.”

His tear-streaked face lifted, and he shot me a glare. “Do you know anyone else around here who is gay?”

Now that he mentioned it, I didn’t. Not openly, anyway.

“Yeah,” he said in disgust before I could respond. “That’s because no one comes out around here. We’re supposed to be men, and being a man means fuckin’ women.” His glare made me think that he was trying to shock me again.

“Maybe around here,” I said. “But not in a large part of the country. When you’re older, you can leave and be true to yourself.” This wasn’t coming out right. “Screw that. You can be true to yourself now.”

“And be called fag and queer at school?” he scoffed. “No thanks.”

“And what about at home? Does your dad know?”

He didn’t answer.

“Your mom knows, doesn’t she? You said she tried to protect you.”

Tears welled in his eyes and he nodded.

“Did she protect you from your dad?”

“She tried.”

“Why did she kill Jim Palmer?”

“She found out.”

“That you were gay?”

Except…why would she kill him over that?

And then it hit me.

Jim hadn’t taken advantage of Ashlynn. He’d taken advantage of Thad. We’d gotten nearly everything wrong, from the very beginning.

“Thad,” I said slowly, “you said you and Spencer were supposed to die in your accident. Did you two intend to kill yourselves?”

He was quiet for a moment before nodding.

“Does anyone know?”

His chin quivered as more tears fell down his cheeks. “Mom. I told her in the hospital, but Spencer didn’t tell anyone. Mom said we needed to keep it a secret. I tried to tell her I was gay, but she wouldn’t let me finish. A few days later, she told me that Jim Palmer was going to talk to me. To help me work through my issues. But we had to keep it a secret. Especially from my dad.” Disgust twisted his lips. “He doesn’t believe in talkin’ about our feelin’s.”