The Summer Girls Page 83
As she drew closer to the dock, she saw Blake standing, waiting, his hands on his hips. He bent to offer his hand to help her up. The hurt and anger she’d felt had dissolved as another part of her—the stronger, more confident part—welcomed the sight of him. There was no room in her heart for petty peevishness. She reached for his hand and felt his strong fingers close around hers.
Blake wrapped a towel around her shoulders, then stood a polite distance back, no doubt still tentative after her flare-up.
“Can we talk about this?” he asked. “Please, Carson. This is too important.”
“Yes, of course,” she replied, her tone conciliatory. She began rubbing her body with the towel. “I’m sorry about my outburst earlier. I’m still tender when it comes to Delphine. But what’s left to discuss? You just told me that it’s all been decided already.” She paused, breathing in slowly. “That they’re moving Delphine to a facility.”
“No, that’s not what I said,” he answered, enunciating clearly. “I said Delphine is not doing well. They are considering putting her in a facility.”
“And without an ID of her being part of our resident community, that was likely to happen anyway,” Carson added succinctly. She sighed and tightened the towel around herself, feeling a wave of dejection. “What’s the difference?”
“There is a difference and it’s what I want you to understand.” Blake shifted his weight, put his hands on his hips, a move Carson recognized now as indicating he’d given the matter a lot of thought and was about to explain himself. “The place Delphine is slated for is very unique. It’s located in the Florida Keys and has natural lagoons with the sea flowing in and out. She’ll still be in the Atlantic Ocean, her home. It’s not a cement pond. And they’ll be introducing her to their pod family. They know what they’re doing. Delphine will be welcomed by a devoted staff and eventually by the dolphins, too. If she goes there, she’ll belong to a new family. I’ve seen it happen with other dolphins.”
The thought of Delphine being welcomed into a family of dolphins took the steam from her sails. It was so like Blake to listen to her concerns, to offer intelligent answers. His reaction was quiet, subtle, and persuasive. She slumped down onto the dock, folded her legs close and wrapped herself tight in the towel. She stared out at the cove that still felt so empty without Delphine.
Blake moved to sit beside Carson. All was silent save for the soft rumble of thunder as the storm clouds drew closer. Choppy gray-green waves slapped against the docks.
“I thought you were against dolphins in captivity?” she asked him in a small voice, striving to be fair and realistic.
Blake seemed to appreciate her effort, understanding at last that, to her, this was not black and white; this was an issue layered with complicated emotions. “If you ask me if I’m opposed to dolphins being captured from the wild, I’d unequivocally say that yes, I’m opposed. No wild dolphin should be removed from its natural habitat for any reason. Not ever. On the other hand, the fact is there are aquariums and facilities that provide a place where injured, nonreleasable dolphins can live out their days, well cared for and loved. These dolphins would likely end up shark bait or starve if released.” He paused. “The Dolphin Research Center is such a place. This is where they will send Delphine, if they deem her nonreleasable.”
A gust of cooler wind sent the spray from a wave sprinkling over them. She shivered and her teeth began to chatter.
Blake’s brows furrowed and he reached to put his arm around her shoulders. She resisted marginally but he murmured her name softly and pulled her closer. Carson felt the strength of his arms and relaxed against him, felt his arms slide around her, holding her tight. She breathed deeply, smelling the faint scent of his body in the well-worn shirt. He didn’t speak and instead rested his chin on the soft hairs of her head.
She reached up to tuck her hair behind an ear. “I’ve been thinking and thinking . . .” Her voice trailed off.
“Thinking about what?”
“It’s like I’m putting the pieces of a puzzle together, a puzzle that’s baffled me for years. It’s beginning to make sense to me now.” She paused. “The fact that I’m always avoiding relationships, never counting on anyone or anything to come through, running from commitments—it might not have been something I was aware of consciously, but looking back, how else can I explain it? I didn’t even want to own a condo, for God’s sake. I’ve always had this . . .” She groped for the word. “. . . this compulsion to be unfettered, to be free from anything or anyone that could tie me down.”
She took a breath. “Until Delphine. This summer, for the first time, I’ve formed a real attachment to, of all things, a dolphin.” She laughed, still amazed at the miracle that she’d experienced. “She changed me. There’s no other way to explain it. I don’t know how to make you understand. All my life I’ve kept so much at bay—my emotions, the people I care about, my responsibilities. With Delphine I couldn’t do that. To communicate with her, I had to move from the inside out.” She shook her head.
“I couldn’t fool her. I couldn’t come to the water angry or sad. She forced me to raise my vibrations; she made me happy.” Carson groaned and put her face in her hands. “I feel embarrassed saying these things to you. You must think I’m some woo-woo chick from L.A.” She dropped her hands and looked into his eyes. “But it’s true. And I’m not prepared to face life without Delphine in it right now.”
“I know.”
Carson sat up again to face him. “I feel like I’m abandoning her. All I’ve ever done is abandon things—jobs, relationships.” She shook her head. “I won’t do it. Blake, you know that is a cardinal sin in my book.”
“She is not being abandoned, Carson,” Blake said, pleading with her to understand. “Quite the contrary. They’re eager to have her. And it wasn’t like you had a hand in the decision. She was hurt, and you helped save her life.”
“Can you explain that to her?” Carson asked. “In a way she can understand? You can’t,” she answered for him. “Just as you can’t understand what I’m feeling. You see dolphins as fascinating, intelligent creatures. But you stop there. You won’t even consider the possibility that dolphins and humans can connect in a very real way that’s not scientific. It’s something I feel in my heart, not my head. I don’t have studies to share with you. But I know our bond is there. I know it.”