Charlie smiled. ‘So I’ve heard. Get us in touch, okay? I love Marcy with all my heart, but I have to do what’s best for my career. I want him to be my killer.’

3

not even the good stuff

BIRCHWOOD GOLF AND RACKET CLUB, AUGUST 2015

Charlie twisted her wet hair into a bun and hobbled as quickly as she could manage to her Jeep. It would take at least fifteen minutes to drive to Birchwood, and she was supposed to be meeting her father at that very moment. She barked out a quick voice text apologizing and saying she was on her way, and threw the car into gear. As soon as she pulled out of the parking lot, her phone rang. Figuring it was Jake calling her back, Charlie hit ‘talk’ on her steering wheel without checking the number. A strange man’s voice boomed through the car’s speakers.

‘Charlotte? Charlotte Silver?’

‘This is she. May I ask who is calling, please?’ Way to sound like a nine-year-old, she thought. It was the phrasing her mother had insisted upon every time she answered the family’s phone.

‘Charlotte, this is Todd Feltner.’ Charlie was stunned into silence. She’d told Jake minutes earlier that she wanted to talk to Todd and figured it would be days, if not weeks, before it actually happened.

‘Hello, Mr Feltner. Thanks so much for getting in touch. Jake said you might possibly be—’

‘I heard you’re freshly out of surgery.’

Charlie was thrilled he had called, and she tried not to think about how abrasive he sounded after only ten seconds.

‘Yes. I still have months to go before I’m ready to play again, but I’m getting there. I’m actually leaving rehab as we speak.’

‘Why?’

Charlie actually glanced at her phone, resting on the passenger seat beside her, as though it might reveal something about Todd’s strange call. ‘Why? What do you mean?’

‘Why are you bothering to rehab it? Maybe I’m confused, but I heard from your brother that you popped your Achilles’. I had a player in 2006 with that exact same injury, and he never recovered from it. And he didn’t also have a wrist injury, which I understand you do?’

The nerve! If it had been anyone else on the line, Charlie would have calmly told him it was none of his business and disconnected the call. But she couldn’t get past the fact that Todd was a living legend: more total Grand Slam wins for his players than any other coach; more players ranked number one; a reputation for bringing players back from injury, addiction, mental breakdowns, and even chemo to play better than ever. If men’s tennis had a celebrity, a magician, and a guru all rolled into one, it was Todd Feltner.

Charlie cleared her throat. ‘I did have an uncomplicated wrist fracture, yes. But thankfully it was my left wrist. They expect it to heal entirely and not affect my backhand at all. The cast is nearly off.’

‘You have a beautiful one-handed backhand,’ Todd said. ‘Clean and powerful, every bit as good as your forehand. Rare for a woman. Rare for anyone, actually.’

‘Thank you,’ Charlie said, feeling herself swell with pride. ‘That means a lot coming from you.’

‘Which is why it’s such a shame you’ll probably have to give it up. Not completely, mind you, but certainly at the highest echelon of competition. You may get those bones and tendons all fixed up by the best orthopedist money can buy, but mentally it’s going to fuck you up. I’ve seen it so many times before.’

‘I don’t know why you’d say that,’ Charlie said, choosing her words carefully. ‘You coached Nadal after that devastating knee injury and he went on to win the US Open. One year later!’

‘Are you comparing yourself to Rafael Nadal?’

Charlie could feel her face redden. ‘No, of course not. But you of all people know that players recover from injuries all the time, and they come back to play their best tennis ever. I know it’ll be challenging, but it’s not impossible. And I’m willing to work for it.’

Charlie checked her mirrors and merged onto the highway. She could feel her own heart racing faster. Who did he think he was, calling her like that just to tell her that she was destined to fail? But more than that, did it mean it was true? If both Marcy and Todd Feltner thought she’d never come back from this injury, was she fooling herself to think she could do it?

Todd cleared his gravelly throat. ‘Well, just some friendly advice from someone who knows: Save yourself the heartbreak and think about retiring early. You’ll go out gracefully, at your peak. What were you ranked pre-injury? Twenty-two? Twenty-five? That’s damn good, better than most players can even dream. Bow out now, take good care of your injuries, and you’ll be able to play non- professionally for the rest of your life. Hell, you may even get to have a family if you call it quits now. Not many of the other girls can say the same thing.’

Charlie gripped the steering wheel in her now-sweaty hand and promptly forgot all about Todd Feltner’s qualifications and accomplishments. Jake was right: this was not going to work. She kept her voice calm and steady as she said, ‘Listen, Mr Feltner. I don’t know why you’re saying such awful things to me, but let me make something very clear: I will come back from this injury. I will get into the top ten. I will win a Grand Slam. I even think I can be number one. Do you want to know why? Because I’m not a quitter like that big baby you once coached, Mr Feltner. I did not leave high school every day at noon to train for six hours and do my homework by the light of the glove compartment on the way home from tournaments to give up. I didn’t miss movies and trips and proms and hanging at the mall and sleeping in and getting drunk and kissing boys to play round-robins at my local country club. And speaking of country clubs, I didn’t ask my father to work day and night teaching rich middle-aged women and spoiled kids and rude bankers so I could bail the first time something got a little challenging. And I sure didn’t leave UCLA – the best year of my life – to quit. So while I have incredible respect for what you’ve accomplished in our profession, and I was planning to ask if you would consider coaching me, I will kindly ask that from now on you keep your opinions to yourself. I’m sorry if I wasted your time, Mr Feltner, but I made a big mistake. You and I are clearly not a good fit.’

‘Charlotte? Don’t hang up.’ Todd’s tone was firm but she could hear it was conciliatory, too.