It was his turn to look bewildered.

"But Molly's coming with me," he said, sounding a bit baffled. "I'm taking Molly to London."

"Jesus," I said in hushed tones. "Don't tell me that you're abducting her? I've heard of fathers doing that."

"No!" he said, exasperated. "Hannah wants me to take her. Hannah wants to go around the world; she's had enough of being responsible for a while. I suppose it's no coincidence that she was suddenly overcome with remorse about not letting me see Molly when she suddenly realized that she needed a baby-sitter for a year."

"Golly," I said. "It hardly sounds ideal. What about poor Molly? And why didn't Hannah's parents insist on taking care of her?"

"Oh, Hannah had a major falling-out with them when she decided that she was going off on vacation for a year," explained Adam. "And Molly will be fine, I hope. I'll get her into therapy as soon as she's able to talk.

"I'm only joking," he said when he saw my horrified face. "I know it's not the perfect upbringing for a child. To be uprooted from her home and for her mother to run away for a year and to be landed on a father who doesn't even know her. But all I can do is my best."

"And what about when Hannah comes back and wants to take Molly back to Ireland?" I said, racked with worry.

"Oh, Claire," he said gently, taking my hand in his. "Would you relax? Who knows what's going to happen in a year's time? I'll worry about that when I come to it. Can't we just live in the now for a little while?"

I said nothing.

I was thinking.

He was right, I decided.

When happiness makes a guest appearance in one's life, it's important to make the most of it. It may not stay around for long and when it has gone wouldn't it be terrible to think that all the time one could have been happy was wasted worrying about when that happiness would be taken away?

414

"So, if I could get to the main point of my visit," he continued, suddenly very brisk. "May I ask you something?"

"Of course." I smiled.

"If I'm being too forward, please stop me," he said, all self-deprecating charm. "But do you think it would be possible for us to meet each other some time in London? Perhaps we could share a baby-sitter? And, of course, any time you need a baby-sitter, I'll be only too happy to oblige."

"Thank you, Adam," I said politely. "I would love to see you in London. And, of course, if you too should need a baby-sitter, please don't hesitate to ask."

"Seriously," he said, his voice dropped several octaves. "This is very important to me. Will we really be able to see each other in London?"

"Of course," I said, laughing. "I'd love to see you."

I looked up and caught his eye. When I saw the look on his face--admir- ation, like, almost certainly lust. In fact, there might even have been love--the smile froze on my face.

"Oh, Claire," he breathed as he bent to kiss me. "I've missed you."

It was at this point that Kate decided that she'd had enough of being ig- nored and started up like a police siren.

At the same time Helen burst through the door and stopped abruptly when she saw us. She took in the pair of us sitting on the bed. Adam holding my hand, my head raised for Adam's kiss, and she said slowly, "I don't fucking believe it."

I braced myself for the onslaught.

Retribution would be both swift and terrible.

I looked at my feet and I was horrified to hear her crying.

Helen? Crying? Surely some mistake. It was unheard of!

I looked up at her, filled with remorse and compassion. I was almost in tears myself.

And then I realized that she wasn't crying.

The bitch was laughing!

She laughed and laughed. "You and Adam," she said, shaking her head, tears of laughter pouring down her face. "The shame of it."

"Why?" I demanded, all annoyed compassion and remorse quickly for- gotten. "What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing." She laughed. "Nothing. But you're so old

415

and..." She stopped, unable to speak, she found it all so funny. "The look on your face! You looked terrified. And I thought he liked me!" she ex- claimed, and she was off again. It was all so hilarious that she couldn't even stand straight. She leaned up against the wall and then doubled over.

I sat and stared coldly at her while Kate wailed like a banshee.

Adam looked slightly bemused.

If there was something funny, then I certainly couldn't see it.

I picked up Kate before she burst a blood vessel and nodded to Adam. "Talk to Helen," I suggested.

Adam unfolded himself and left the room after Helen.

I rocked Kate in my arms and tried to soothe her. She was a lovely child, but, I swear to God, sometimes her timing was so off.

I could hear Helen laughing all the way down the stairs.

And a while later she arrived back in.

"You fucking bitch," she said cheerfully, sitting down on the bed beside me. "You had us all fooled. Pretending to be totally heartbroken about James and all the time you had the hots for Adam."

"No, Helen..." I protested weakly. "It wasn't like that."

She ignored me. She had more important things on her mind.

"What's he like?" she said, drawing conspiratorially nearer to me and dropping her voice several decibels. "Has he got a big one?"

"What kind of a question is that?" I asked, pretending to be horrified.

"I won't tell anyone," she lied.

"Helen!" I said, my head swimming slightly. I think I would have pre- ferred it if she had been furious with me. Now I'd have to put up with her being my best friend so that she could find out what Adam was like in bed so that she could tell everyone.

"Where is he anyway?" I asked her.

"In the kitchen sucking up to Mum. But never mind that," she said en- thusiastically. "I think he loves you."

"Oh, Helen, go away," I said, starting to feel exhausted.

"No, really, I do," she promised.

"Really?" I asked tentatively. I was such a sucker. I shouldn't have listened to anything she said. At my age I really should have had more sense.

"Yes," she said, sounding unusually serious.