“I know Lila. She’s your roommate, right? I had a class with her last year,” Kian murmurs.

Interest glints in his brown eyes. For me? For Lila?

Just power through, Ana.

A gusty breath out comes from me. It’s ten at night, and I really just want to go home, check on June, eat some ice cream, and go to bed.

I grimace. “Yeah, Lila’s great. Let’s cut to the chase: I’m looking for a rebound, a brainy guy for some fun.” I rake my eyes over Kian, my tone flat. “You qualify. Interested?”

Kian gapes at me, his eyes darting from me to River. “Oh. I assumed you, ah, were with River.”

I cock my head. “But I just broke up with Donovan—wouldn’t that be too soon to jump on his frat brother?” I say it lightly, as a joke. But really, is it too soon, Kian? What do you think?

He shrugs as he eyes River. “I’m not in a frat, but um, all’s fair in love and war, I guess?”

“We aren’t a thing,” I say crisply. Because River has a forcefield around himself, and then I’m recounting our conversation, again, about meet cutes and notes. Something wasn’t right about that. He didn’t tell the whole truth. My neck tingles and sweat breaks out on my face. He. Lied. I feel it. My head goes back to that night, trying to piece it together—

“Well, I’m interested,” Guy One says, interrupting my thought. He shuts his book. “I’m a chemistry major. Way smarter than Kian.”

“I’m in,” Guy Two adds. “You free right now? There’s a party at the ATO house. I’m done studying—”

“Hey, I believe she’s talking to me,” Kian says with a small laugh directed at his friends.

My eyes sweep over them. “That seriously worked? A random girl you’ve never met just shows up, one the whole campus has gossiped about, and you’re eager to jump on the Ana train?”

“Um, yeah,” Kian murmurs, his eyes lingering on my tits again. “You’re hot. I’m in, baby.”

River flinches as if someone slapped him.

I straighten my spine. “Enlightening—really. Fascinating. Ever say baby girl?”

He blinks. “If you want me to?”

“I will,” comes from Guy One, then, “Baby girl.”

“I’ll call you whatever you want,” Guy Two says, murmuring his agreement.

A huff comes from me. “Wow. The dating pool at Braxton is crap—”

“Whiskey, tango, foxtrot,” River mutters in my ear. “Abort.” He takes my elbow, murmurs a Good to see you, we have to go, then turns me around and stalks away with me in tow. He stops to grab the earring and sticks it in my hand.

His body is wired and tense, and I exhale as he leads me past our table and to the stairwell.

“First, Kian didn’t like my shoes. Second, he assumed I didn’t understand physics. Third, he stared at my breasts more than my face.” My voice rises.

He walks faster. “We’re getting off this floor.”

“I admit, it didn’t go smoothly.”

“You’re shaking, Anastasia.”

Am I?

“You shook the whole time. It’s why I came over.”

I stare down at my hands, grimacing at how they tremble. My legs feel weak, and I swallow down emotion that’s been building for the past few days. From the looks on campus to the whispers…

My emotional state got worse when I sat down with River…

His personality, his mercurial eyes, his beautiful soul…he’s a hum in my heart. Truth, it’s been pricking at me for a year, and now, it’s flaring right to the surface, aching to be acknowledged. Not only that, but there’s something nudging me in the back of my head, a truth I can’t grasp hold of as it dances just out of reach—

“Are you okay?” He takes my hands in his.

I swallow down the thickness in my throat. “I did not enjoy that.”

“Neither did I,” he mutters. “Kian is a prick. He called you baby, and he doesn’t even know you. I wanted to pull his tongue out.”

“He is out. Marked off the list. Not even for revenge. Want to know what’s worse? A girl in my philosophy class asked me if I needed drug counseling today.”

“Who was it? I’ll have a talk with her.”

I smirk. “You’re intimidating people for me?”

“Maybe.”

I sigh. “Honestly? I can deal with the fallout from Donovan. I made a stupid mistake with Bryson, yes, but I’m happy with who I am. I like me, but what I don’t have is a school next fall, and it’s scary…”

“You have me.”

“Do I?”

“Yes, I’m your friend.” He studies my face, then flings open the door and we go up the stairs.

Friend.

I firmly disagree, River.

And I’m sick of pretending.

21

I take the steps with him, our hands brushing in the stairwell. He opens the door to the fifth floor, and we step out into the space.

I take in the lobby area for the administrative offices, currently closed. A twenty-foot badger statue is in the center, a water fountain at his feet. His triangular-shaped face is striped along his snout, his mouth open with sharp fangs, his body thick, his claws raised as if he’s about to burrow into something tasty. “I like the silence,” I murmur. “But that badger is hideous.”

“Agreed. Follow me past the monster.” He leads me down a darkened hallway that opens to a spiral staircase. He goes ahead and opens a door at the top, draping his hoodie over my shoulders as we walk out to the center of the rooftop. I pull it against me, sticking my hands in his pockets. It smells like him and I sigh.

See-through partitions block the wind on the sides, but the stars gleam down at us, the muted lights of campus glowing off in the distance. A fire pit crackles in the middle of a lounge area.

“Wow,” I murmur as I do a spin. “This is beautiful. I never come up here. And it’s empty.”

He shrugs, glancing up. “You took me to the sunrise. I bring you the stars.”

I crane my neck and find the Milky Way. “They remind me that I shouldn’t dwell on small things I can’t change. The school thing will work out.”

“They make me think of my dad. He’s somewhere out there watching me. Listening. He would have liked you.”

I stop spinning and look at him. I knew his dad passed when he was in high school—that’s common knowledge—but I’ve never heard him talk about it. “There’s an Eskimo legend that says they aren’t stars at all, but openings where our loved ones watch us.”

“I like that,” he says softly.

“What happened…wait…can I ask that? I’m sorry. I never know what to say…”

He tucks his hands in his jeans. “Car wreck after a game. We went down a ravine and hit rocks. I couldn’t get to him, couldn’t move or call 911, and then his chest just stopped…” He trails off, a hesitant look on his face.

“Tell me about him. Who was he to have a son as beautiful as you?” I say. “And I don’t mean your appearance. I mean you. That piece of you inside that shines.”