The earth stops spinning on its axis. I become aware of all the cells in my body, of every singing nerve, my ragged breathing, the tremor skittering over my skin. We stand there and stare at each other as a powerful magnetism wipes my mind blank.

My mind is frozen, but my body is all sensation, all pounding heartbeat and flying pulse, the faint press of his knuckle on my skin the center of my universe.

His lips part. He leans closer.

Holy shit. He’s going to kiss me.

“Mr. Maddox, I need to speak—”

Portia barges into the kitchen, heels clicking, a file under her arm. She sees us and skids to a stop.

Michael spins away and resumes fixing himself a cup of coffee as if nothing has happened, while I stand rooted to the spot, mortified and strangely guilty, unable to speak or move.

Ice forms in long, crackling fingers on the floor and wall around the spot where Portia stands. She stares at me, her gaze hard, her posture rigid, her expression accusatory, then she turns her icy glare to Michael’s back. “Excuse me, sir,” she says stiffly. “Your secretary told me you were in here. I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

Michael turns around with a mug in his hand, a casual smile on his handsome face. “You weren’t interrupting. Joellen and I were just discussing her application. She’s very eager to get the job.”

It’s the wrong thing to say. If people could spontaneously combust, Portia would be splattered all over the walls and floor right now in little frozen pieces.

She cuts her freezing gaze to me. Her lips thin and her nostrils flare, and I’m afraid she might physically attack me.

“I see,” she says softly, burning holes into my head with her eyes.

This is a disaster of Hindenburg proportions. It’s clear what Portia thinks Michael meant by eager and what she thinks I’m up to.

With one knuckle brush, I’ve become the office harlot, sleeping my way to a promotion I wouldn’t otherwise deserve.

My voice strangled, I say, “I’ll just be getting back to work now.”

I slink away, tail between my legs, skirting Portia with my gaze on the ground. As soon as I’m out of the kitchen, I break into a breathless run, headed back to my desk where I plan to spend the rest of the day designing myself various size scarlet As to wear on my clothing.

If I didn’t have bad luck, I wouldn’t have any luck at all.

A few minutes before five o’clock, my desk phone rings.

“Joellen Bixby speaking.”

“Joellen, it’s Michael.”

My heart slams against my rib cage. I look around surreptitiously, as if Portia might be lurking around the corner of my cubicle, then sink into my chair and cover the phone’s mouthpiece with my hand. Why I suddenly feel like I’m in a spy movie, I don’t know.

“Um. Hello, sir.”

He sighs, and even that sounds beautiful. “Please, stop with the sir. Everyone calls me sir. It makes me feel like my grandfather.”

“Sorry. Habit. You being the CEO and all.”

Michael clears his throat. “Yes. About that.” There’s a short pause, then he exhales in a gust. “I’m sorry for what happened in the kitchen. That was inappropriate of me. I hope you can accept my sincere apologies. I clearly made you uncomfortable, and it was absolutely out of line—”

“I wasn’t uncomfortable.”

Silence.

Strangely emboldened by his lack of response, I drop my voice to a whisper. “I mean, I was, but in a good way.”

Another exhale, this one longer and slower.

“You’re not saying anything.”

“I’m relieved.” His voice drops an octave. “And . . . really happy to hear that.”

I hold the phone away from my face and scream silently, kicking my feet up and down and bouncing in my chair like a lunatic. When I put the phone back to my ear, I dredge up every ounce of courage I have and ask him the $64,000 question.

“Why?”

After a nerve-wracking pause, his response is even lower than before. “You know exactly why, Joellen.”

My panties are curling off me like burning paper. My glasses are fogging like they did the first time I read Fifty Shades of Grey. My heart is in danger of exploding inside my chest.

I whisper, “No, I don’t. Tell me.” Who is this person? This bold, flirty person? A body snatcher has apparently consumed me.

I hear some rustling, the squeak of a chair, what sounds like footsteps echoing off tile. “What are you doing?”

“Pacing.”

He’s pacing. And his voice is rough. And he’s happy that I wasn’t uncomfortable in a bad way, but won’t answer when I ask why.

“Michael,” I whisper.

“Yes, Joellen?”

“What’s happening?”

More rustling. He might be sitting down. I imagine him in his office, staring at the floor, looking all sorts of beautiful and tormented.

He begins haltingly, like he’s forcing the words out against his will. “You know . . . that I’m . . . getting divorced.”

“Yes.”

“And . . . also that . . . I’m the CEO of this company.”

“Yes.”

“And you’re . . . my employee . . . who has recently applied for a promotion.”

I can’t answer because euphoria has frozen my tongue, but my heart is screaming YES! YES! YES!

“So this is . . . complicated.”

I shoot to my feet, blind to anyone or anything around me, a death grip on the phone, my soul about to rip itself from my body. I listen for what he might say next with the terrified focus of someone waiting for the verdict from a jury in her murder trial.

“Are you still there?”

“I’m here.” My voice is shaky, but I don’t care. A nuclear bomb could go off in Lower Manhattan and I wouldn’t care.

Sounding miserable, Michael sighs again. “I’m sorry. I’m putting you in a terrible position. I’m being an idiot. I never should have opened my mouth.”

Too late. He’s opened Pandora’s box now, and all the devilish little creatures are running amok, screaming in glee throughout my reproductive organs. “You were going to kiss me, weren’t you.”

It’s a statement, not a question, because now I’m sure it’s true. I might have been able to convince myself it was my imagination before this conversation, but things have drastically changed.

“I should go.”

“Michael. Tell me.”

There’s a long, cavernous silence, then Michael whispers, “Yes.”

He hangs up.

I lift my arms in the air, throw back my head, and let out a victory whoop so loud everyone in the cubicle maze stops what they’re doing and stares.

From behind me comes Shasta’s irritated voice. “Bitch, what the hell is wrong with you? People are busy doing nothing around here—be quiet!”

I start laughing and can’t stop.

Michael Maddox was going to kiss me.

I can’t wait to get home to tell Cam.

FOURTEEN

I stop at the corner market on the way home to pick up a good bottle of wine, because I’m celebrating. The signs of Christmas are everywhere. Shop windows twinkle with colored lights, a soft dusting of snow covers the ground, holiday music plays from every loudspeaker, fake Santas panhandle on corners for charity, aggressively ringing bells in people’s irritated faces.

It all seems magical. I’m feeling the holiday spirit like I’ve never felt it before, simply because Michael’s lips had the intent to press against mine.