“Well, that was nice of him,” she muttered, not sure how to address that one.

“Right? It’s not every day a guy gives a girl he’s trying to kill a beautiful necklace. Especially one from the 1400s.”

“The 1400s?” she asked, sucking in a soft breath of fascination. “You’re really lucky. If he hadn’t been hired to kill you, I’m sure he would’ve been a great guy.”

“But, Cook, this isn’t just any necklace.”

“Of course it’s not. It was given to you by an evil assassin from another dimension. It can’t just be any necklace.” She filled her lungs and girded her loins, metaphorically. “Okay, hit me. What is it? I can take it.”

“Inside this innocent-looking pendant with this innocent-looking jewel and these innocent-looking carvings is another dimension.”

Cookie had started to reach for it. Just to touch it. She stopped and slowly pulled her hand back.

“And it’s not just another dimension. It’s a hell dimension. Kuur was sent to trap me inside it for all eternity. The bad part is I sent him, a demon-like being from another dimension, into a hell dimension in which dozens of innocent people have also been sent. And now I have to get them out, one by one, all while leaving him inside. And to make matters worse—”

“It gets worse?” she asked, her face turning an ashen white.

“I have no idea how to do any of that.” I had regained all my memories as a god, but for some reason, things didn’t work quite the same in my human state of affairs. I still had to learn everything.

“Well, we all have our little problems, right? Of course this one makes mine sound a little pathetic in comparison.”

“Don’t you dare say that. Amber’s growing up, and it’s hard to see that happen. She’s just a little girl in our eyes.”

“Charley, you had to send your daughter away before you even got to know her. My problems are ridiculous in comparison.”

“They most certainly are not. Of course, I didn’t tell you the best part yet.”

“There’s more?”

“Cookie, don’t you know me by now? There’s always more.”

“In your world, yes, there is. I’m ready. Whatever you got, I can handle it.”

“Okay, one of the things I learned when my father crossed was that Reyes, my beautiful, breathtaking husband, is a god.”

I figured I’d give her time. She clearly needed it. She was now gaping at me, her mouth hanging open far enough to cause a triple chin. When I’d given her long enough—we did have cases to see to, after all—I said, “He’s one of the gods of Uzan.”

“Wait, aren’t they bad?”

“Very.”

“Oh, Charley. I’m not sure I understand.”

“Join the club. I don’t even know if he knows. Satan tricked one of the three gods of Uzan. He trapped him using this jewel.” I brushed my fingers over the glass covering the gem, the dimension, inside. “It’s called god glass.”

She leaned closer but still kept a safe distance. “Why—how are there innocent people inside?”

“Long story involving an evil priest. Suffice it to say, it’s very powerful, and from what I could tell when this pendant was open, very big.”

“I—I don’t even know what to say.”

“Don’t say anything yet. It still gets better.”

Her eyes rounded, but I plowed forward.

“Let’s say, for argument’s sake, I can stop the gods of Uzan. Let’s say I can stop Reyes if I have to, using this glass.”

“Stop him?” she asked, panic-stricken.

“If I have to,” I reiterated. “And let’s say Michael—you know, the archangel?—let’s say he lets me live.”

She paled further, but I kept going. Best to just get it all out there.

“Let’s say I can get Beep back, and we can, I don’t know, save the world or whatever we’re supposed to do.”

Cookie nodded, right there with me.

“There’s something even worse.”

“Than a hell dimension in a necklace?”

“Yes.”

“Than the fact that an archangel tried to kill you?”

“Only that one time, but yes.”

“Than the fact that your daughter is destined to battle Satan for control of Earth?”

“Yep.”

She shook her head, at a complete loss. She leaned forward and put a hand on mine. “Charley, what?”

“Reyes is paying child support.”

She stilled. Blinked. Furrowed her brows. “What?”

I fought the wetness springing between my lashes. “Reyes—my Reyes—is paying child support. I saw a receipt.”

“Okay,” she said, taking a moment, “let’s just say that, yes, Reyes paying child support is worse than all that.”

“I don’t understand your point.”

“Who is he paying? I mean, is it to an old girlfriend?”

“You think he has old girlfriends?” I asked, sniffing.

“Charley, you have old boyfriends, right?”

“Yes, but—but I wasn’t in prison for ten years. And he couldn’t have been terribly fertile going in. He was, what? Twenty?”

“Old enough to get a girl pregnant. Trust me.”

“But what makes you think he even knew any girls?”

“Have you seen that boy?”

“I mean, he was really shy growing up.”

“Because that’s such a chick deterrent.”

Damn it. She was right. Hot, sexy, shy guys? Like a blazing inferno to an ovulating moth. “How many old girlfriends do you think he has?”

“I’ll look into it.”

“Like, a guesstimate. Five? Ten?”

“I’ll look into it,” she said, but this time she had her soothing I’m-here-for-you voice on. It helped.

“You will?”

“Absolutely. Besides, there has to be an explanation. He would have told you if he had a child.”

“Maybe he just found out. He hasn’t been paying it long. Three or four months, I think. Either that or his other child is only three or four months old, which would mean he got someone else pregnant before I conceived Beep.”