“Wouldn’t miss it, even though I did have to pass up the chance to go skinny dipping with the seventh Tsar of Russia.” She wriggled her brows at me. “Now, where is the sexy beau of yours? I need something tall, dark, and scrumptious to look at, if you know what I mean. Men on this side aren’t always easy on the eyes.”

I laughed softly. “He’s right over there, being accosted by Cookie’s second cousins.”

“Perfect. I’ll join them.”

I almost doubled over when Aunt Lil disappeared, then reappeared behind Reyes to give his ass a squeeze. He glanced at me, his face accusing as though I had something to do with it. Not to worry. Aunt Lil soon spotted Osh, who was fending off an elderly woman who’d had one too many Chardonnays. The best part, though? Reyes had blushed, and I fell a little further.

4

SOMETIMES I WONDER IF THE PURPOSE OF MY LIFE

IS TO SERVE AS A CAUTIONARY TALE TO OTHERS.

—T-SHIRT

The day had turned out beautiful in every way possible, but one person was missing through all of it: Angel, my departed thirteen-year-old sidekick. He never missed a party. I considered summoning him, but he already knew about the wedding. Surely he would have come if he’d wanted to. He did a lot of stuff with his own adopted family. Maybe they had something going on today as well.

Still, I doubted it. Angel had been acting strange lately. More so than usual. He popped in at the most inopportune times, acted like he had somewhere else to be when he did stop by, and hadn’t hit on me in months. Maybe he was accepting my marriage with Reyes, respecting our union, better than I thought he would. Or maybe the pregnancy freaked him out. Every time he did pop in unexpectedly, he seemed to avoid looking in Beep’s direction. I needed to talk to him about it. Get him counseling. Though that could be difficult, considering the situation. If only Gemma could interact with the departed.

After two more hours of mingling, guests started to slowly dissipate. Not literally, as they were corporeal, but they began giving their final congratulations and saying their good-byes. I wondered why they were leaving before Cookie and Uncle Bob did. The happy couple was supposed to head off to its pre-honeymoon honeymoon bliss while being pelted mercilessly with rice. It was tradition, and it wasn’t often I got to throw things at my BFF or my uncle. I had every intention of making every throw count, but they wouldn’t leave. Cookie was still in her wedding dress and Ubie in his tux and they were mingling and dancing and eating and drinking as though they had no intention of leaving.

Didn’t they just want to be away from it all? I wanted to be alone with my sexy-as-hell husband so bad, I ached. But I didn’t want him changing out of that tux before I had my way with him. How many opportunities would I have to rip a tux off him? I could reenact all those James Bond fantasies I’d had since I was, like, two. But I had another appointment to attend soon, so the clothes ripping would have to wait. It was probably a good thing Reyes was being kept so busy. He had checked in off and on, but his attention was always needed here or there. He did give an incredible toast that only once mentioned the fact that Uncle Bob had wrongfully convicted him of murder. So that was nice.

When yet another woman old enough to be his grandmother headed Reyes off and demanded his attention before he could get to me, I giggled at the forced smile on his face. She flirted, batted her lashes, and patted his biceps about twelve times too many for his comfort. He took out his phone and typed as the woman spoke to him, her movements exaggerated. I couldn’t be certain, but I had a feeling she was talking to him about how she used to be a pole dancer until her hip gave out.

My phone chimed. I took it out of the delicate clutch that matched my dress and read Reyes’s text.

Aren’t you going to save me?

I don’t know. I’m having a lot of fun right now. Wanna sext?

He crossed an arm over his chest while holding his phone. One corner of his mouth twitched as he leaned back against a tree and typed.

Absolutely.

Sweet. What are you wearing?

His eyes sparkled with mirth.

Animal print boxers and striped socks.

I burst out laughing, gaining the attention of everyone around me. I texted back, only this time I wasn’t teasing.

You are so beautiful. How are you even real?

He sobered, staring at the phone a solid minute as the woman described her hip replacement surgery. At least, that’s what it looked like from my vantage. He lifted an index finger to put the woman on pause right when she was getting to her recovery and strode toward me. His gaze didn’t waver from mine as he walked, his gait like that of a panther on the prowl, the tux adding to the allure, and my body flooded with a molten heat that pooled deep in my abdomen. He took the three steps to the kitchen with one long stride and stopped in front of me.

I looked up and let my gaze trace the outline of his full mouth, the angles of his strong jaw.

After a moment, he wrapped a hand around my neck as though to pull me to him, but Ashley called out.

“Aunt Charley! Uncle Reyes! Mom says we have to go.”

After several seconds, he managed to catch her just as she jumped into his arms.

“Can I stay the night? Pleeeeeeease.”

Bianca walked up behind her and shook her head at us, adding a threatening glare should we even think about defying her.

I patted Ashley’s back, in awe of the death grip she had on Reyes’s neck. She put her head on his shoulder and offered me her prettiest pout.

Amador stepped up to take her. “Uncle Reyes has enough women in his life today,” he said, peeling Ashley off him with a chuckle. “He doesn’t need a fluffy orange tornado following him around.” He had been calling our dresses orange all day, mostly because Ashley was not a fan of anything orange.