I feel like I’m crawling in filth because of her lies.

I tap my fingers on the table as I wait for everyone to take their seats, my knee jiggling, my teeth grinding together. My rage is boiling through my veins, burning as it goes. I chase the bile down my throat, swallowing it back as I watch Rav sit down.

“This shit is fucked up,” Levi breaks the silence first.

Everyone starts talking at once and their voices are like nails down a fucking chalkboard.

“Silence!” Rav yells and the room quietens. “I don’t give a fuck who she is. What I care about is what the fuck our next move is. Blackwood’s men said they’d be back.”

He might not care, but I fucking do. Lucy made me believe she was someone she isn’t. I raise my eyes to Titch who is watching me like I’m a live bomb waiting to explode.

“Fucking say it then.”

Titch holds his hands up. “I ain’t saying shit.”

“You want to, so fucking say it.”

I’m pushing him, but I’m so fucking angry, I need to get this rage out somewhere.

“Knowing who she is changes things considerably,” Day says, his voice calm as he interlinks his fingers together on top of the table. “We assumed the shooting at her office was because of her boss, but now…” He breaks off, shrugging.

“You think she was targeted because of who she is?”

“I don’t think it’s coincidence that Isaac Blackwood’s missus was involved in a shooting.”

“Could have been Leon and Elijah who went there,” Titch interjects. “Would explain why they’re sniffing around our territory.”

“Why the fuck would they shoot her?” I demand.

“They didn’t,” Day says. “The bullet skimmed her head. Maybe she got in the way.”

“Why don’t you just ask her what happened?” Fury’s voice is quiet, but it gets everyone’s fucking attention—mine included.

I glance at Rav who shifts his shoulders. “Someone message Whizz and get them down here.”

Levi gets to his feet and steps out of the room to grab his phone from the box outside the door.

“Nox?” Rav says my name slowly, carefully. I know what he’s asking. If I’m okay.

I shake my head. I’m so fucking far from okay it’s unreal. I don’t dare speak, though, for fear of what might come out of my fucking mouth.

The room is silent as we wait for Whizz and Lucy—Natasha, whoever the fuck she is—to come down. When she steps in behind Whizz, I see the nerves in her expression and the urge to comfort her is overwhelming, battling with my righteous anger. I tear my eyes from her, my mouth turning down in disgust. I can’t even look at the lying bitch.

“We need the fucking truth from you, Lucy,” Rav says.

She lets out a breath. “What do you want to know?”

“The men who shot at you… you know who they are?”

There’s a pause then she says, “Leon and Elijah—they came for me. It’d been years since I’d seen Isaac. It took me off guard. When they tried to take me out of the building, Hank intervened and was shot.” She says it so matter-of-fact, coldly even. It’s a stark difference from the woman I held crying in the shower, destroyed because of what happened.

“So, you are the reason Blackwood’s men are in town,” Levi mutters, leaning back in his chair.

I risk a glance in her direction, even as my heart shatters like glass at her betrayal.

“I’ve been in hiding for a long time. I thought I was safe.”

“Why are you hiding?” Whizz asks.

“I didn’t want to be with Isaac anymore, but he isn’t exactly good at giving up his toys, and that’s all I am to him—a toy.”

“You lived this secret fucking existence with my woman, with my fucking daughter under your roof?” Rav explodes.

I don’t blame his rage. I feel it too, coursing through my veins like liquid poison.

“I didn’t mean to put anyone in danger,” she snaps back, the first hint of steel coming into her voice. It’s a bad idea to poke the bear when Rav is already fired up.

“Sasha know who you really are?” Day asks the question that sits on my tongue.

“Sasha knows nothing.” She glances down at her hands, her brow furrowing. “I thought Isaac had given up, let go of me. It’s been over three and a half years since I last saw him. I got… complacent. I should have kept running.”

Her words are a kick to the gut and I feel the heavy sensation of that boot lodged in my stomach as I glare at her.

“You didn’t think to mention that you’re fucking married? That your husband is a mobster? Not once?” I demand with deadly venom in my tone.

Her throat works for a moment. “I’m sorry I hurt you, Nox. That was not my intention, but I couldn’t let anyone know my secret. I wasn’t sure if—”

She breaks off.

She’s wrong. She didn’t hurt me—it ran deeper than that. Lucy fucking destroyed me.

I grit my teeth. “If what?”

“If who I am might be used against me.”

I laugh at her words, but there’s no humour in it. “You think we’re that sick we’d use a woman against her husband? You have a low opinion of me and my brothers.”

“That’s not what I—”

I hold up a hand. “Don’t give a fuck what you meant. Don’t care about anything that comes out of your lying fucking mouth.”

She flinches as if I’ve struck her and I wish I could take the words back, but I just keep glaring at her. I’m barely keeping my temper locked down and the urge to go nuclear sits on the edge of the precipice.

Rav juts his chin in Whizz’s direction and he snags Lucy’s arm, steering her towards the door. She glances back and before she disappears through the door, she mutters a “Sorry,” at me.

It scores a hole through my gut hearing that from her. I never thought a woman could hurt me, but Lucy has brought me to my knees.

When the door shuts behind them, Titch speaks. “What do we do with her?”

“She doesn’t want to go back to him,” Fury says.

“We can’t exactly keep her at the fucking clubhouse,” Levi retorts, dragging his tattooed fingers through his hair. “Not unless we want to start a war with Blackwood.”

“Nox?” Rav speaks my name and my eyes slide towards him. “She’s yours. What do you want to do?”

I tap my finger on the table, my expression sullen.

“I can’t stand liars.” I shake my head. “But we owe her for Sasha and Lily-May, so we ain’t handing her over to that psycho.”

As angry as I am, I still love the woman. That hasn’t disappeared because of what’s happened. Don’t get me wrong, I’m furious she lied, but I can’t switch my feelings off just like that.

“Blackwood’s going to come here looking for her, Nox,” Day tells me something I already fucking know. Lucy made it clear he wouldn’t let her go.

“Lucy seem like she wants to go with that fucker?” I snap, unable to stop myself. A murmur goes around the table. “Then we ain’t sending her back to him. She nearly fucking died trying to escape him.”