“Officially she ain’t under club protection,” Rav says, candid as ever.

Anger flares through me. I start to get up from the table, but Day pulls me back down. “Hold your fucking horses. We didn’t say we weren’t going to have your back.”

I sink back into my seat.

“Then what the fuck do we do?”

Rav considers me for a moment, then says, “We go to war.”

21

Lucy

My heart is hammering in my chest as Whizz leads me out of the room. I glance at him as he shuts the door tightly behind him. If I was looking for an ally that hope has been squashed. He’s acting like I’m a foe. I guess to the Sons I am. They must hate me for bringing this shit down on their heads. I had no idea the danger I have put Nox in. When he threw me that gun and told me to shoot him before Isaac could, my insides shrivelled and my mouth filled with rot. I would never hurt him, not intentionally anyway. I know I’ve destroyed him. I could see the betrayal and hurt etched into his face.

It wasn’t my intention.

I’d do anything to protect him.

I love him.

I have done from the moment I met him. Facing the possibility of losing him, I realised how strong my feelings are for him. I need him like my next breath. The thought of my life without him leaves a coldness spreading through my gut. I’d rather eat that bullet he wanted me to put in him.

“What happens now?” I ask, trying to steel my words, trying to keep myself calm even as my mind races.

“Depends what they decide at the table.”

I lift my chin and snap my back straight. “I won’t go back to Isaac. I’ll die before that happens.”

“Sweetheart, you stirred up a hornet’s nest here. You put Nox in an impossible situation where he’s probably going to end up on the wrong side of a bullet. There’s no way out of this. We hand you over, your husband will decimate the club. We keep you hidden, he’ll still decimate the club.” He shakes his head before looking me straight in the eyes. “Nox stood up in church and claimed you, went against his brothers and President to defend you. That shit means something around here and you fucking threw it back in his face. You put a price on his head.”

My stomach fills with ice, claws clamouring up my spine as his words settle over me like a funeral shroud.

I grab his arm, stopping him from walking. “You honestly believe Isaac will kill Nox?”

“If Nox fucked my wife, I’d gut him.” I swallow down my fear and release my hold on him as if his skin burns me. “If you’d come to us, Lucy, told us what was happening, we might have been able to help, but now you have us shooting in the dark.”

His words burn through me, my guilt eroding everything it touches. This place is Nox’s home—Sasha’s too—and it could be destroyed because of me. Nox could die because of me.

Whizz is right.

Isaac will gut Nox for touching me. It won’t matter that I wanted it. Someone touched his property. He’ll do worse to me. Death would be the better option. I should never have let things go as far as they did, but being with Nox was the first time I was truly happy in my life. Selfishly, I wanted that—even if it was fleeting.

“How do I fix this?”

He stops walking and turns back to me. The corridor seems to shrink as he steps into my space. “You can’t. Now, all we can do is wait for the fallout.”

“There has to be a way.”

“You don’t understand the gravity of what you’ve done. Blackwood will kill Nox, then he’ll come against the club. You’ve brought a war to our door, little girl.”

His words steal my breath, leaving me gasping for air. This was never my intention. I never wanted to bring trouble to the club.

I swipe at my tears as the door to the room we just left opens and the brothers pile out. Rav pushes past us, huffing like a raging bull. I flatten myself to the wall, trying to make myself invisible. He walks past, only to spin back to me, stepping so close I can see my reflection in his eyes.

“If this shit touches my girls.” The warning cracks between us, hanging in the air.

I seek Nox out, but he doesn’t look at me. My heart stops and pain lances across my chest. His cold shoulder hurts more than any beating I’ve ever taken.

The men move up the corridor with purpose and I start to follow, but Whizz grabs my arm.

“You stay.”

“I need to talk to Nox.”

Whizz shakes his head, and I sag against the wall, watching the brothers disappear around the corridor’s corner.

“He ain’t ready to listen to you. There ain’t nothing you can say.”

He’s probably right, but the words hurt all the same. I need to explain to him what happened, why I did what I did.

“There’s one way. Hand me over to Isaac.” The thought leaves a sour taste in my mouth, makes my stomach lurch with fear, but it might be the only way to save the man I love.

Whizz snorts at my assertion. “That’s not your decision. It’s in the club’s hands now.”

“Whizz—”

“You really think that’ll solve anything? The damage is already done. There’s no fucking easy way out of this. Wake up and smell the fucking blood because war is coming.”

Horror gnaws at my gut, his words physically hurting me as he leads me into the common room. He’s also right. There’s no restitution the Sons can offer that Isaac will accept. He’s a petty bastard when he wants to be.

Whizz orders me to sit at a table while he heads over to the bar and steps around the back of it. I tip my head back and stare at the grubby ceiling, my heart racing. I caused a war. If anything happens to any of these men, I’ll never forgive myself. If anything happens to Rav, Sasha will never forgive me.

I blink my tears away, trying to control my swirling emotions. My belly tightens as it churns. My mess has always been just that—mine. I’ve never dragged anyone into my shit before, and the guilt is eating me alive.

Whizz returns with a bottle of coke, which he slides in front of me.

I don’t drink it, even though my tongue is glued to the roof of my mouth. My stomach feels too unsettled, like anything I put in it would curdle.

For a while we sit in silence. Then Whizz asks, “How did you end up married to Blackwood?”

I give a mirthless chuckle. “Wrong place, wrong time.”

I was sixteen when I met him, barely legal. He was twenty-six. We met at a party I shouldn’t have been at and he was smitten from the moment he laid eyes on me. Things didn’t start off bad. They were good in the beginning. Isaac gave me everything I needed and more. I remember being elated that such a sophisticated man was showing me attention—attention I never found at home. He wore expensive suits, drove flash cars, showered me with gifts, clothes, anything I desired. I revelled in it like a pathetic child, needing praise.

But the good times didn’t last.

Men like Isaac can’t hide their true selves for long and Isaac couldn’t either. His darker side would sneak out, and I’d glimpse the demons that live inside him. I always made excuses for his behaviour, but there was no excusing the things he did. He had all the power in our relationship and I was powerless against a man who was the devil made flesh and blood. I had no friends, by that point I’d isolated myself from my family. I was trapped and for six years, I was the worst version of myself. I hated everything about me. I hated that I never stood up to him and when I did, I could do nothing to stop the beating. I hate that he used my body without my permission, as if he had the rights to it. I hated that he’d hurt me and then promise to never do it again.